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State Of Hypnosis

from Puzzle by millicow

/

lyrics

Don Juan peered at me, as he had done the first day we met
"You think about yourself too much," he said, and smiled
"That gives you a strange fatigue, that makes you shut off the world around you."

I'm not the me
That I want to be
A million miles away
In another time and space
I might just be mean
It's not what I mean
I'm lost in translation
From thoughts into language
I spend most of my days
In and out of a state
Of hypnosis my brain
Opens closes the gate
I often drift far away
Into a hypnotic state
Gazing blankly into space
Staring divinity in the face

Fixated on this language like Castaneda
Attempting impossible descriptions
The shifting emotions I'm fascinated
To write about that which cannot be written
The insane inner change of transformation
Alchemical process I live in
I drift in the ocean, no raft, no island
Just dust in the wind at the mercy of infinity
If I could share the way I feel behind my blank and vacant stare
Then maybe they would taste the rain that words can paint, they fail to portray it
I've been trying to find a way to say this, explain why I suck at communication
Always kinda overstimulated I say that mentally I'm a little spacey
Like a slice of my mind is confined behind bars
And that's why I've been writing and hiding behind bars
When I type I have time to organize my mind
But when I speak I feel like I'm as bright as age five
And I can't lie; I'm utterly tired
That's the only way I can start to describe
The state of fatigue ruling over my mind
A tyrannical king; you don't know what it's like
I really don't want to talk in my day to day life
Give me a show on the weekend, a stage with a mic
And for the next six days, let me stay away and write
I'd like to rest in my cave where it's dark and it's quiet
Cause when I open my eyes, it's way too bright
And the sound in my ears sets my brain on fire
Sensitivity is my enemy in this demanding society
As my energy nears infinity I'm expanding inside

This intensity gets the best of me in these manic nights
My propensity for insanity at its all time high
Creativity got a hand in me, have I lost my mind?
Puppet on a string, thoughts come in a stream and I just want to scream, letting out the steam
From my pot of tea, boiling fervently, pressure burning me from my inner being
Slowly turning me into a better me oh so painfully, I just want to sleep
Please give me relief; that is all I need before the flaming heat puts an end to me
When can I just be at peace?

I believe that what has been coming into me is the energy of divinity
And the intensity I'm experiencing is the difficulty of my human being
Physically mentally slowly adapting to the teeny tiny drops that I receive
Of complete purity burning everything that isn't really me and it's killing me
Here to plant the seed of a newer me, with the ink I bleed I write my eulogy
Transformation leading to a mountain peak with a view so deep that the truth I've seen
Has burned its colors into my eyelids forever; open or closed, I see the horizon I never
Could have composed, imagination not clever enough on my own to ever create what's ahead of
My soul
I surrender to my creator
The path continues
And there is nothing greater
I thank god for my intuition
It pays off when you sit and listen
So stay strong in your busy living
The days to come will be hitting different
Pray for help when you're in a pickle
And I'm not talking about religion
There's phenomena just beyond our vision
And they want us all to become awakened

Looking for the me
That I want to be
How many miles away
To find that time and space
Sometimes I might be mean
That isn't really me
I'm lost in translation
From thoughts into language
I spend most of my days
In and out of a state
Of hypnosis my brain
Opens closes the gate
I often drift far away
Into a hypnotic state
Gazing blankly into space
Staring divinity in the face

credits

from Puzzle, released January 13, 2024
Quote: "A Separate Reality", Carlos Castaneda

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millicow Kansas City, Missouri

love.

A style all of its own, inspired by rap, hip hop, synthwave, classical music, heavy metal, black metal, synthpop, and more.

Packed full of finely crafted sounds, textures, melodies, rhythms, harmonies, and conscious, insightful poetry, I translate spirit into sounds that aim to induce states of psychedelic trance and emotional catharsis.

other projects:
greatinbox.bandcamp.com ... more

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