Get all 10 millicow releases available on Bandcamp and save 40%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Puzzle, Train Of Thought, Bedrock, Spaces Between Spaces, Unlightenment, Orbital Resonance, Service Drift, Clouded Light, and 2 more.
1. |
||||
2. |
Take A Trip
04:35
|
|||
|
millicow
21 years
Let's go
Just another guy with a voice to find
Come take a ride with me through my mind
Twenty one years alive; now it's finally time
Twenty one years of life to inspire these rhymes
They say it's only five minutes then your lifetime passes by
Feels like I've been in it nine times as long inside
Never want to forget this so that's why I write these lines
So come take a trip with me tonight and meet my mind
Seven years writing music, and three years as a poet
Facing fears, fighting demons, even if I never show it
Now I've come to unleash what I carry in my head
I just want to leave a legacy to live through when I'm dead
Plagued by a sense of urgency as time slips away
Want to use this opportunity before it goes to waste
The decades pass so quick but most of us don't fight decay
Ain't no rest for the artists, yeah I've got some things to say
Now it's time for me to break down these walls
Join me if you please while I unleash it all
I'm finally ready to mix my words with my songs
This is my therapy and I've waited so long
Gonna sing about some things that you've never heard before
If you think incessantly, you're the one I made this for
On the brink of insanity, that is where we find the door
What most people cannot see are all the things we can't ignore
The psychotic drowns and the mystic swims
The same water surrounds, but what's the difference?
Who am I to say if I'm better or I'm worse
Than the shaman or the man in the psychiatric ward?
If you feel like no one around you understands the way you feel
And you struggle to distinguish imagination and what's real
If you've gone too far and now you can't turn back
And you don't know who you are, then you'll love my tracks
So put the headphones on and just sit back
As life goes on, maybe it won't be so bad
We will always have songs to share the feelings that we have
And when I'd rather be gone, this is how I keep on track
|
||||
3. |
Nightmare
03:01
|
|||
|
Lights go off
Sheets come up
Time for all my
Fears to erupt
When that closet comes open
It will all be over
When the dark cloaked men
Come to bring the terror
Nightmares ensue of supernatural nature
Monsters pull you into a sequence of horror
Spaces between spaces come alive at night
No parents here to save you in their realm of fright
Wide awake in bed, mind is shaken with dread
Slide the blanket over your head, cover your feet or you're dead
Any minute now before the demons come out
To take you down where no one can hear you shout
|
||||
4. |
Social Anxiety
10:06
|
|||
|
do you know how it feels
when you're just being yourself
never meant any harm
and people act like there's something wrong with you,
time and time again?
people tell you to be you
until you actually do
and then they see you're not like them
not who they wanted you to be.
do you know how much it hurts
when you just want to be understood
but your efforts never seem to work
why'd you ever think they would?
why do i let this get to me?
why do i care what people think?
i just want to feel connection
what is so wrong with being different?
why have i felt so much rejection?
why do i need people's validation?
perfect recipe for depression
anxiety and feelings of isolation
Freshman year of high school and I
Don't know what my mind's doin'. This
Happy kid I used to be, now
Drowning in anxiety. I
Got self conscious and I withdrew; I
Wished that I was more like you. Don't
Look and don't say hi to me, just
Let me hide inside my screen
I
First realized that I was strange when I
Started school back in third grade. Be-
fore then I had been homeschooled, but
Here, I was new and so confused. So
Many other kids my age; be-
fore long, I knew all their names. But
They already had their friends, and
Nobody cared to let me in
At
First I persevered, unscathed, though I
Felt so alone and out of place. Over the
Years the fear of rejection came; I sup-
Pressed my emotions, personality erased
In
High school it all hit me at once; you
Know the way it often does. I
Hardly even talked to my parents; my
Racing thoughts had me so nervous
I was so scared of being judged
Even if only in harmless fun. My
Face, my voice, my every little movement; my
Hair, my clothes, my entire appearance
At the time I didn't know
Any coping mechanisms
So I did all I could
To avoid being noticed
Oftentimes, people'd question
"Hey man why are you so quiet?"
And I'd simply shrug my shoulders;
Didn't know how to reply to it
When I got back to my bedroom
That is where I would escape
With video games and music, I would
Stay in there all day
This all got so stressful that I
Got physically ill. I fought
Cold after cold and my
Sinuses aren't right still.
And
You can bet that only made my
Social anxiety get worse. My
Nose wouldn't stop running; I
Really felt like I was cursed
In the darkness of that winter,
Something inside me shifted
I don't know how it happened,
But I got an intuition
I realized that my ailments
Were entirely self-inflicted
And if I had the power to do this,
Then certainly I could fix it.
I dug myself into this hole and
I would dig myself back out. Having
Heard a whisper from the soul,
I didn't even have a doubt.
I would break down the walls of old and
Turn my mind around.
New flame of will so bold, it's
Never flickered out.
My
Mind had spiraled into such
Irrational patterns,
Fears running rampant and my
Confidence all shattered. Re-
Spond to negative beliefs by
Reinforcing new ones. To
Change your brain, all you need is re
Petitive influence.
They
Sound ridiculous at first, but
Do not let that stop you. You
Need to hear these friendly words be-
Fore things can improve. Re-
mind yourself, over and over; it's
what you have to do. It's
Only a matter of time before
You believe them too.
You are beautiful and kind and
You deserve the best. Your
Soul is made of gold inside, and
You are truly blessed. The
Luck you have is largely just a
Matter of belief, di-
Rectly correlated with the
Way that you perceive.
Nobody is judging you, and
Their opinions aren't important.
They're already occupied with
Their own inner problems.
You deserve good friends and you're
Surely soon to find them.
You are worth more than you know!
Be thankful you are human.
If your mind rejects these words, that's
Totally okay.
Right now you are feeling hurt, but
You will find a way. I'm
Not saying it's easy work; it's
Not easy at all. But
Time will make it all be worth it as
Peace begins to grow.
You can take my word when I say
Healing can really happen. Your
Mind is the most powerful tool that
You could ever own.
Love yourself.
It's okay.
|
||||
5. |
One More Box
04:24
|
|||
|
Working long hours underneath the warehouse lights
Where it's never quite day and it's never quite night
Counting the hours until the time is right
Gotta get that pay; can't afford to sleep tonight
Sleep a couple hours in the bright daylight
Run a couple errands while there's still a little time
Sun goes down; I'm ready to fall asleep in bed
Now it's time to go to work; got a long week ahead
Paycheck arrives but it's never enough
Half a day goes by and there's almost nothing left
Food and gas and smoke, bills and car repairs
It just never fucking ends; clinging on for dear
Life, it sucks and then you die
Work your ass off because your basic human rights
Are nowhere to be found; you aren't even allowed to live
Without slaving away until you're old, worn and sick
Working long hours underneath the warehouse lights
Where it's never quite day and it's never quite night
Counting the hours and there's no end in sight
Gotta get that pay and feed the family tonight
One more box
Just one more box
One more box
And one more after that
Never mind how many hours
They're all inside your head
And don't try to keep count
Time moves quicker without it
There is only this moment
Let them come and let them go
Become one with pain and effort
Lose yourself in a state of flow
Because it's all one more box
Just one more and another more
One day you'll be off
And come back tomorrow for one day more
Just one more week
That's all we need
Just one more week
Then the cycle repeats
So groove with its rhythm
And move with the beat
Don't sit down for a moment
Momentum is all you need
Every box, every day, every week, every year
Take it one at a time, right now and right here
|
||||
6. |
Burnout
03:30
|
|||
|
Sleeping through hallways of burnt-out reflections
Later is the time no more than expected
With every present in the shadow of affliction
No change to find in the land of the restless
Slumber is a number of discomfort down under
Illness beyond vision, the ailments keep on twistin'
Sunlight is a dark night when the fight takes no flight
No escape, no energy to erase the hurting
Vision beyond vision scares us back into the sickness
Truth means death, but not yet, I'm not finished
Unable to grasp what I could be
Freed of toxicity in theory
Aware but uncaring, these blind-eye habits
Somewhere deeper, scary mirror waits in the attic
Emptiness within, a trap that lures many rabbits
Ending of the din, I ask if I can really have it
Unconscious at the wheel, and gone is true will
Time is passing yet remains completely still
Telling the sickness to wait until the morning
The strain within is a weight beyond my bearing
And so goes the flaw of those who saw
A glimpse of life in a world of strife
And so we fall to our flesh after all
Not yet ripe to transcend the fight
|
||||
7. |
One Of Many...
04:04
|
|||
|
Am I cursed or blessed
In my search for rest
Is it just a test
To become my best
On this personal quest
To take hold of my destiny
So whatever comes next
Will bring out the best in me
But I struggle with stress
In the rubble that's left
Cause this world is a mess
When the love is suppressed
How long is left til our death
Come on and make your best guess
Cause we are burning our nest
The truth we're turning against
Don't see each other as friends
Only another to send
Six feet under and then
What will be left of us when
We give our brother his end
We leave our mother to fend
We join the murderous trend
Instead of turning within
Cause we are hurting within
And we aren't learning to spend
A single moment to sit
In honest introspection
Don't want to face our sins
See who we've really been
Trying to erase the pen
But history doesn't forget
All I want is to live
For everyone to shift
And work together on this
Appreciate our gift
There's more than enough to go around
If we don't hoard what we've found
Trying to soar above the ground
Exploiting wars in the towns
With a mind cursed and blessed
I'm not like all the rest
Gotta get this off my chest
I'm just trying to do my best
Be the love, be a healer
Maybe even be a leader
For the ones who are feelers
Waking up to what is realer
Be a unique kind of singer
Not another drug dealer
I write these songs for the thinkers
Who want to hear something deeper
Tired of the wannabe gangsters
Where are the spiritual rappers?
I'll fill this void with my unfiltered
Never-ending mental chatter
And I'm sick of this twisted
Fucking capitalistic system
Do all I can to resist
Dedicated and persistent
I have no valuable assets
So I'm not working for you ass hats
You're just my stepping stone
Cause you step on everyone you own
That's why I spend so much time
Writing all these fucked up rhymes
Cause without committing crime
How else can I cut through the line
I don't have to make the big time
I just want to make a dime
Give my wife and kids a good life
Give my parents enough to retire
After all you've done for me you might say
I don't owe you, but I love you, you're my family
And I hate to see you strugglin
I have my whole life ahead of me
You deserve to grow old in peace
Big house, wrap-around porch, summer breeze
No rent, no mortgage, just finally free
That's my mission/vision; that's my dream
Well, only one of many...
|
||||
8. |
Little Jake
02:11
|
|||
|
My name's Little Jake; everyone look at me
I'm not very big yet, but soon I will be
It's hard to have fun when you're so short and chubby
I just want to run, but my legs are too stubby
Sometimes I cry when I'm not feeling well
Sometimes I fart and it makes a funny smell
Sometimes I poop til it fills up my pants, and
I'll pee in your face if I get half a chance
After I eat I'll sleep half the day and
When I wake up, I'll be ready to play, cause
There's lots of things I still can't figure out, like
How to make noises come out of my mouth
Someday I'll learn how to poop on the stool and
Chase little girls on the playground at school, so
Please don't get mad when I keep you awake
I won't always be such a Little Jake.
|
||||
9. |
Six Chaotic Spirits
03:04
|
|||
|
My house is possessed by six chaotic spirits
Wrecking balls that leave nothing where you left it
Under their spell I continue to give them nourishment
Even scooping up their noxious excrement
They sway me with soft bodies of fur
Persuade me with their comforting purrs
Lazy manipulative pieces of shit
Always sneak their way out of helping to pay rent
Only contribution a dead mouse on the doorstep
You think that's a payment our landlord will accept?
Oh I'm sorry for interrupting; you may now resume
Destroying the window blinds in every room
|
||||
10. |
Rift
01:56
|
|||
|
close your eyes
listen to your mind
you are not
your thoughts
i slipped through the grips of a rift
that could not exist, into an impossibly absurd abyss
to ungroup in a soup, swirling loops unfurling loose
the cessation of my existence
and persistence of my senses
disorientation relentless
in this forbidden dimension
close your eyes
|
||||
11. |
||||
12. |
||||
13. |
||||
|
meht dniheb sliat rieht gniggaw
emoh emoc ll'yeht dna enola meht evael
meht dnif ot erehw wonk t'nseod dna
peehs reh tsol sah peep ob elttil
|
||||
14. |
||||
millicow Kansas City, Missouri
love.
A style all of its own, inspired by rap, hip hop, synthwave, classical music,
heavy metal, black metal, synthpop, and more.
Packed full of finely crafted sounds, textures, melodies, rhythms, harmonies, and conscious, insightful poetry, I translate spirit into sounds that aim to induce states of psychedelic trance and emotional catharsis.
other projects:
greatinbox.bandcamp.com
... more
millicow recommends:
Misaligned: A 4-Track Odyssey
by Jacob Duncan
Jacob Duncan is one of my biggest musical inspirations ever since I was a child. His music spans across several genres with roots in metal, blues, and much more.
go to album
Yesterday Was Dramatic, Today Is Ok
by Múm
múm is is another outstanding band whose unique style blows my mind. I like to listen to this album while driving down the freeway; it really cures the anxiety. Keep in touch with your inner child!
go to album
This is amazing 80s style electronic music with a dark, dystopian theme. Not much else to say; you just have to hear it for yourself.
go to albumIf you like millicow, you may also like:
Dreams Out of Joint: A Tribute to Philip K. Dick
by Machina ad Noctem
supported by 18 fans who also own “Bedrock”
A great selection of artists. some new to me, with some great music.
go to album
Music For A Confinement: Memories Of A Quarantine
by Various Artists
supported by 17 fans who also own “Bedrock”
An unique compilation derived from a period of isolation in which all these great musicians and sound enthusiasts were able to experiment and create unique tunes to let the mind wander off into blissful oblivion.
go to album
Prismatic / Loomstate
by Curved Light
Opalescent synth waves crash gracefully on top of each other on this enlightened electronic album.
go to album
